I do want to say something else though. I really do feel badly if I’ve been hurtful in any way, such as what you were saying about my talking of Mulan. I didn’t realize what I said had a harmful effect, and I really feel bad about that, and any other things that may have been hurtful.
Just like I imagine you probably didn’t realize just what you were putting across when you told me for example that the snow white song I posted left you cold and how you “particularly despised Cinderella for letting herself be put upon by those horrible stepsisters. I admired the girls who didn't let themselves be put upon. They stood up for themselves, which I think everyone should do, male or female” (I heard: those that dream of rescue or being swept away or need a hero stronger than themselves
rather than forcing themselves to be that hero instead by battling things on their own
well they must be pathetic). And that the problem with words like 'feminine energy' was that it “implies weakness, passivity” (I heard: those qualities are baaaad, one must be strong and active oriented to be worth anything). And that it was just fine for you to embrace some of Pat Allen’s stuff and reject other parts but when I did so your big concern was that I was not following all her stuff. And that my view of feminine energy was to you “parasitic” and being like “a fluffy toy cat or something”.
When we get past all that though, I still think there is some real common ground. I had written this stuff before I read your recent yahoo comment where you express the very opposite ("I don't recognise anything of myself in the stuff that Under His Wing writes..."), but I'm exploring this anyway as despite our key differences I really do still sense some common ground. I’m drawn to where you said for example this:
“I wouldn't actually mind all that much if my husband was to leave the running of the house to me, so long as he was satisfied with the way I ran it. If he was content with the quality of my housework, and if he would eat food the way I cooked it, that would be all right with me…”